The Top 13 Talking Cigarette Pack Quotes

13."Warning: cigarettes give you a raspy voice that makes you sound as cool as you look."

12."[Cough] [hack hack] [cough] [thpt] Smooooth."

11."Don't worry; you have an extra lung."

10."All of a sudden, your wife nagging you about smoking isn't nearly as annoying, is it?"

9."...That was the sound of a 65-year-old smoker hocking up a lung oyster at three in the morning."

8."Are you sure you wouldn't rather have a carrot stick?"

7."Betcha can't smoke just one."

6."I have less tar and nicotine than the leading brands, you big pansy."

5."Buy another pack. Tobacco settlements don't pay themselves, you know."

4."The Marlboro Man has determined that the Surgeon General is a pussy."

3."Each cigarette shortens your life by three minutes, so smoke faster."

2."You have smoked... THREE... packs today. At this rate you will develop emphysema in... FIVE... years." and the Number 1 Talking Cigarette Pack Quote...

1."Hey, Cowboy! You smell like Slash's hair!"